January 19, 2006

On My Last Nerve, They Are

I have fucking had it with those bastards who live downstairs from me. They are pissing me off to no end. I endured their bullshit for months on end before I said word one to the rental agency/landlord.

One would think that if you pissed off a neighbor so bad that half of you got your ass kicked out of your dwelling, (yes, they had too many people in that apartment, three more than were allowed there and when I said something to the agency, those three got booted), you would learn to be a fucking decent neighbor and stop acting like douchebags every other day.

But these jackoffs learn nothing. I have had to go down and ask them to turn their shitty music down more times than I care to count. Tonight I am cleaning my house, almost done and just about to get ready to relax and unwind when I'm bombarded by

Boom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM Boom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOMBoom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOMBoom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOMBoom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOMBoom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOMBoom BOOM Boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom

Hell fucking no. So I go down there and knock on their door. First of all, they don't speak any fucking English except the little kid. Learning from the past, I don't even try to communicate with the adults, I just request the little kid. I said, 'nino' and they act like they don't know what I'm saying. Dicks, I know your stupid asses speak Spanish now bring the boy.

Boy comes to the door and I tell him that I would like them to turn the music down. I ask him why are they always so loud, I'm a quiet neighbor, why do they disrespect? He translates and the mom comes to the door, screaming in Spanish. Bitch, I don't speak that ugly fucking language.

Through translation I am told that it's one of the fuckweasels birthday, (which I think is a fucking lie because every damn time I have to confront these assholes it's some sort of celebration, they tell me) and that I need to have more understanding. I told the lady I don't really care if it's someone's birthday, the music is loud. And as I'm saying this, I am standing there wondering, why...WHY on God's green earth, if this is a celebration with all these people, is she coming to the door in her fucking green underwear?

The bitch didn't have any pants on! She came to the door in a tank top and underwear! Guys, don't even bother getting turned on, the hag is like 40-50 years old, haggard looking, ugly as hell and wearing nasty, faded, green underwear. How fucking ghetto can one get?

She then asks some other lady, a little old lady who bothers no one and likes to sit out front and smoke cigarettes, if she can hear the music or thinks it's too loud. Ok, first of all, you can't hear the fucking music outside, you can HEAR IT in my apartment!

They insist that the music isn't loud so I invite them to come to my apartment and take a good listen. At first they refuse. Oh? Why not? Hmm? Cause maybe I'M FUCKING RIGHT! They continue to insist that it's not loud and I tell them again to come up and listen so finally one of the guys and the boy come up.

They come in, I close the door and allow them to listen. Yep, they ADMIT IT! They fucking admit that it IS loud! I ask again to turn it down and thank the little boy for translating for me. (Poor kid always gets caught up in the middle since the rest of them refuse to learn English.)

They go downstairs and I wait. Do they turn it down? No. Hell no. Not only have they not turned it down, NOW I also get to listen to them thump and bang around their apartment. Because they are ALL crack whore monkeys! So, I guess the next time I go to pay my rent, I'll let the agency/landlord know that while those three may not be actually "reside" in the apartment, they come over all the time and every single damn time they do, I get to listen to their shit. I will tell them that I invited them to come take a listen and they conceded that it is, indeed, loud. That even though they admitted this, they refused to turn it down. That I am sick of having to deal with this crap and that it says in the lease that "guests", which is what they are now, are not to disturb the tenants who pay rent to live there.

Who knows...maybe they will all get the boot. If there is a God, they will and I can finally have some fucking peace and quiet. That is, aside from the incessent horn honking and bass blarers in their cars as they sit at the stop light outside my building.

Posted by S. Faolan Wolf at January 19, 2006 08:15 PM | TrackBack

Everybody knows a party isn't a party until some lady decides to get half naked and start screaming in Spanish.

So... um... what's your address again?

Posted by: Maine at January 20, 2006 04:06 PM

I once lived in an apt bldg and had noisy downstairs neighbors- loud stereo, tv. My response was to go to the basement and turn off the power to their apartment. They learned the lesson.

Posted by: barry at January 21, 2006 06:51 AM

Oh the joys of apartment living. How I miss my neighbors in California. Downstairs we had the people who cooked fish in garlic and onions at 5am EVERY morning. Across the hall in door #1 the LOUD bass and in door #2 the rather kind gentleman who wore WAAAAY to much cologne. Lovely. Mind you...I was pregnant at the time so the mixture of Polo and the lovely breakfast downstairs was enough to make me want to kill myself!

Posted by: SailGirl at January 21, 2006 09:22 PM

You have my sympathy. Nothing more aggravating than bass blaring out.

Posted by: ruth at January 24, 2006 01:53 AM
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